Monday, October 6, 2008

Let them eat avocados...

Sunday morning we headed to the farmer's market to pick up our week's worth of organic produce...ok, I really go for the free samples. Better than Costco. mmmmmm

As we headed into the tent with the avocados I began my inspection of the goods. I gave a few of the avocados a little squeeze to test for ripeness. We had planned on eating one of them that day and I wanted it at its peak. As I'm going about my business...thoroughly enjoying the vibe at the market...a guy maybe in his early 30's next to me picks up three avocados and mumbles, "after you've squeezed them all..." Thinking he meant the comment in a joking "oh you've touched all the produce!" kind of way I simply gave him a sideways glance and a confused half smile. I proceeded with my inspection of the produce. Finding all of the avocados to be rock hard I was getting a little bummed and then this same guy mumbles under his breath very passive aggressively that I was ruining all the avocados. I responded with "i don't want a rock hard avocado". He responded, getting obviously worked up "people set those out on their countertops where you put your finger and.....[trailing off]. I just said, "you don't know how hard I'm squeezing them and I'm not ruining them." As he started to walk off I looked at Chris and loud enough for this guy to hear said "What an asshole!". The guy turned around and mumbled something about not being an asshole, probably said something rude and then wandered off. 

The entire exchange left me with ruffled feathers and a bad taste in my mouth. It also had me second guessing myself and my knowledge of how to select produce. I've gently pressed every single avocado I've ever purchased, have never ruined one and have always picked perfectly ripe avocados. We ultimately just grabbed a bag of six and went on our way...I noted that all of them in the bag were hard. 

Later that day we went about making sandwiches. Mine was going to be a pita sandwich with hummus, cucumber, carrot and avocado all from the farmer's market. As I went to cut open that avocado....guess what? Rock hard, completely unripe and entirely unedible. I was understandably irritated and felt a strong desire to find this passive aggressive asshole with a lack of understanding of produce and make my point one more time.

And for those curious...I found this online.

"A ripe avocado is relatively firm, but will yield to gentle pressure when held in the palm of the hand and squeezed. Color cannot always be trusted to determine whether or not an avocado is ripe. Indeed, the squeeze test is the most accurate.
If you plan to use avocados immediately, buy ripe ones. But if you want to buy them a few days before you plan to use them, you can buy them when they are hard and do not yield to squeezing. Then just set them out in a cool place and wait for them to get ripe."


I am Sam said...

Avocados always have to be squeezed slightly. What a jerk off. Besides... you can wash the outside of the avocado and you only eat the meat inside. Again I say... he is jerk off!

Daniel Lee said...

What to do. Where to go. For avocado? Colorado. Or Corcovado, in the grotto. Then from the mercado... some nice gelato. And now I'm gone, incommunicado.

P.S. I like Nelly Furtado.

dave said...

Jess, do you shop for eggs the same way, gently squeezing their shells until they break, ever so slightly? Hey, I'm just asking--you don't have to call me a...well, you know what.