Thursday, October 29, 2009

I feel bad...but not bad enough not to press "publish post".

Friends, Internets, Strangers....I'd like to tell you a story about my friend....hmmmm what shall we call him to maintain his anonymity....ah well...fuck's Linus. That's his real name. (Hi Linus!).

Just a few months after I moved to LA (six years ago) I got a panicked phone call from Linus telling me he needed me to take him to the hospital because he was REALLY sick. I immediately hopped in my car and rushed out to the west side not knowing the lay of the land or where ANY hospitals were. At the time Linus was attending a certain southern california film school (anonymity!) and was on a student health plan which required him to use a specific hospital. I asked him what hospital, but he didn't I tried calling his mother or sister...or the nurse associated with the school's health plan...all while driving around Los Angeles in the dark, a strange part of a new city while Linus moaned and whined in the passenger seat. Finally we decided to just go back to his apartment...where I made him some it fizzed Linus whined about why it was so bubbly and fizzy and how he couldn't drink it and how it tasted bad. I made him soup...and as he took a sip he gagged dramatically and spit it back in the bowl...I thought maybe he was about to yak....but no....the soup was just too hot. Poor little bunny.

It should known that Linus didn't have the bird flu (that was all the rage at the time) or an don't think me cruel...sure he was sick, but...well...c'mon. He was "man sick".

So...I came across this little gem of a clip on her entry about her husband's vasectomy. so funny.) and could not restrain myself from writing this post....sorry Linus....I told you! I COULDN'T resist. I tried...but I COULDN'T.

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Giving the Platypus a run for it's money....

I swear to god this is a real animal.

Internet, this is the Mexican Neotenic Mole Salamander.
Mexican Neotenic Mole Salamander, this is the Internet.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Dream Crusher.

Me: "I'm gonna be a lady bug for halloween...and wear a red tutu."
Chris: "Ladybugs don't have red tutus"

well. duh.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Coworkers say the darndest things.

Today is basically Friday for me....we leave for a wedding in Austin tomorrow at super early o'clock and won't be back til that's pretty cool. I love Austin. Last time I was in Austin we drank for free for hours because the bar was giving away free Coors Light. Gee! Thanks!!! I'll take two!

Anyhoodle....the point is...I've been a bit out of it lately what with all the busy-ness and lots of "to do" lists swirling around in my head for work, wedding and one might say I've been a little scatterbrained lately...or at least I feel like it.

(Get to the point, Jess.)


My normal morning routine consists of some basic makeup application. Nuthin fancy....some Bare Minerals foundation to even out my complexion, some eye shadow and some mascara to darken my blonde eye lashes....occasionally I forgo the mascara if I'm feeling lazy and only wear foundation. Despite me thinking I look like I'm 12 years old without eye makeup on I get the occasional compliment that I look "refreshed" or "fresh faced". Well gee. Thanks! Awesome! This morning, however, I forgot and unintentionally skipped my light spattering of powdered foundation and just put on a little bit of mascara and eyeshadow. Fantastic. Left the house feeling normal. 

This is going somewhere I swear....

I'd been at work for over an hour, having spoken to no one yet, when my producing partner walks in and starts telling me a I turn to face which point she stops mid sentence and, in horror, says "ohmygod! did you get a black eye??!?!?!?!!?" 

I'm so put off by her reaction that I get all self conscious and head straight to the bathroom thinking that I must have applied my gray/blue eyeshadow like a 3 year old and it's all over my face. But I look in the mirror and see... just my regular old face. Then i realize that what had her gasping in horror is MY FACE!!! MY REGULAR OLD FACE!!!  This is JUST HOW I LOOK!!!! I have my grandfather's dark undereye circles compounded with the fact that I didn't fall asleep til 3am this morning and forgot to put on makeup. 

So the point of this post is...I'm sorry Chris. I'm sorry that people think you beat me when I forget to put on makeup. When I asked you this morning if you'd still love me even if I was horribly ugly I didn't realize that you had already proved it by waking up to this face every morning. Here's to the next 80 years...


Friday, October 9, 2009

Let the countdown begin....

I swear I have a handful of unfinished posts sitting in draft form on the ol blogster that I have simply not had the energy to finish...but it's not that I haven't been thinking about blogging...things have just been too hectic. 

The unfortunate part of blogging in a public forum is that there are some things that I just don't feel right posting about...just in case the wrong person or people should stumble upon this humble bloggity. That said I've undertaken a project that has kept me busy 5-6 days/nights out of the week in addition to working full time and in addition to planning our wedding which now is 9/10 months away (depending on how you look at it... in my mind October is basically over...what? it's only the 9th? yea. it'll be over soon.). 

I seriously can't believe how it is sneaking up on us. We've been working on our save the dates for what seem like MONTHS now and are hopefully finally ready to get those printed and going. I love them. Like, hard. And I'm not just saying that because they are my brain child and not something generic we just bought off the internet, but that is part of it. :)

As of now I've been able to check off a few pretty big items off the to do lists. We've secured the location (which means that the caterer and booze situation is already taken c
are of) , deposits have been put down for our officiant and our photographer (the awesome and oh so talented Sarah Yates). ALSO....the dress. The dress has been chosen, ordered and partly paid for. Yay! After such an arduous search, I have some slight nerves that in six months I'll put on the dress and feel totally different about it...but I think that's probably normal so I'm going to squash those anxieties deep deep down and not think about that for another five the meantime every time I swoon over a dress online I have to tell myself that it costs a million dollars and would look horrible on me. That seems to be working so far.

Now all that stands in my way of checking off everything on my 12 months + list is Chris completing one task. (That's right mister. I called you out on the interwebs.) 

Oh lists. How I love you. Even if your only purpose is to be ignored.